Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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