And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
