yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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