There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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