ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
