It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
