I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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