he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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