she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
soo... how was my night?
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