Capitaan dildo arrescate!
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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