Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
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