He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
