Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
