They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
