I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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