was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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