ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Shame - the story of my life.
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