I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize
