tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
