i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
