Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Just cropdusted the office
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
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