please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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