Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
