on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
