people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
please come you make the beer taste better
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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