They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize