It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
