So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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