If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
you have to choose: penises or morals?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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