you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
