The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Still dying that you shit outside
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
