Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
