I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
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