you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
