And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
