how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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