you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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