I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
