i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
