i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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