Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
