he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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