Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
