Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
