there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I am naked and annoyed.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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