Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize