Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
