ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
