i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
