their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
