"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
You left your phone here
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